Stupid, Stinky Bus Ride

Normally I can sit for hours in one position and not feel a bit perturbed but today was a different story.

I was travelling from Sihanoukville to Siem Reap in Cambodia by bus and I knew that some of the companies were to be avoided if possible. So I made my choice, checked the times and booked a tuk tuk. I thought I was set to go.

Then things went wrong. I’m going to number these things because I like looking at lists with numbers.

1. The tuk tuk driver drove past the bus station that I thought I was going to and stopped at another one down the road. I said “Is this the Capitol bus company?” He said “Yes”. I bought a ticket. Then the bus showed up and it wasn’t Capitol. I asked for a refund and the guy said no refunds, you will be transferred to Capitol in Phnom Penh. I was pretty mad but got on the bus because it was too late to get the other one.

2. I had heard to avoid the Paramount Angkor Express at all costs. In Phnom Penh they put me on a bus to take me to another bus
station. I brought my ticket to the window and the new one said “Paramount Angkor Express”. Poop. These guys are known for driving recklessly (while slower than other bus companies), stopping for no reason, overselling, no air conditioning, breaking down and plain old sucking. I thought “Well, maybe it won’t be that bad?”

3. I was sitting in no air conditioning beside the seat buddy from hell. He spread out like a crane, dripping sweat all over me. He got off once and got left behind so we had to circle back for 20 mins to get him. He brought the foulest smelling substance with him to dip his apples into with his little stick. I dry heaved twice then put my hat over my nose. It suspect that the reason he took so long at the stop was because he had gone looking for cat feces, sugar and vinegar to make a dipping paste.

4. We stopped for no reason.

5. We got a flat tire.

6. The driver yelled a lot into his cell phone.

7. They had more people than seats so they sat on the floor and it smelled like melting humans.

8. The 6 hour trip took 9 hours.

The bright side is that I learned to just wait for the next bus if I’m not certain. Where have I to go??? Plus I made it. There were a few moments I thought I wouldn’t.